So you’re expecting! Great! Except its not your first. You’re due with baby 2. It’s supposed to be a time of joy and excitement, except all you keep hearing is:
- “It’s going to be tough juggling the responsibilities of more than one child!”
- “You’re oldest will be so jealous!”
- “Now you’ll NEVER be able to sleep again!” (Because with your first you are supposed to sleep when the baby sleeps, but who can do that with a toddler [or preschooler] running around?)
And maybe … just maybe … it’s not number 2 you are expecting, but a third child instead. Then the comments change to:
- “Now you’ll never be able to afford child care!”
- “Re-entering the workforce will practically be impossible at this point!”
Well I’m here to tell you that everything your friends are telling you IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE! There will be times your kids will feel jealous about all the attention the baby gets. And you may worry about how you’ll have enough love and time for another child. Childcare will be more expensive.
So what’s left? It can be hard to see the positives in the midst of all these comments. I’m not going to lie … I was scared about being a mom with three kids … like really, really scared. But then it happened and I’m so amazed at this incredible journey I’m on. Sure there are crazy moments in my house, especially when the kids are running around screaming at each other, and often times I’m often busy beyond belief … but there are many positives if you choose to look at them that way.
Multitasking Improves
Often times kids keep you from getting the sleep you need. For example, you know you have to be up at 6 a.m. to make lunch for your oldest child in school, but the baby kept you awake off and on until 2 a.m. During those moments where sleep isn’t possible, you can get A LOT of things completed by babywearing (which is the only way my youngest wanted to sleep). Sweeping, Mopping, and cleaning up dinner from the night before can all be done in the middle of the night! PRESTO … clean kitchen in the morning!
Built-in Buddies
The great thing about having more than one child is they always have someone to play with. Granted they may argue and fight, but even then its a perfect way to help those little minions practice their negotiation skills. It also teaches patience, learning how to control ones own feelings, and the occasional stint in timeout teaches them how to sit still!
Free Help
Ever get tired of loading and unloading that dishwasher all on you own? Laundry bogging you down? Dust piling up? Well, why not employ your little helpers! The more kids you have, the more help you have! Even my youngest child (who is 1) gets in on the cleaning action bringing me socks and putting away plastic bowls.
Independence
With one child, it’s hard for them to learn independence because mom and dad are always right there helping out along the way. But with more than one child, you have to divide your time and can’t give your total attention to one individual. My oldest child struggled with “sharing” mom and dad once my other children came along. But from introducing new family members, she learned to do more things for herself and be more independent (within reason).
Pride
From this newfound independence my daughter gained, she also found a huge sense of pride in being able to do things like pour her own cup of juice or find her own snack in the fridge. She began to feel even more pride once she was able to help out her little brother. Some nights while I was feeding number 3 she would even help her brother (number 2) brush his teeth!
And child number 3? She is the luckiest by far! Here’s why…
Awesomely Experienced Parents
Prime example: temper tantrums … been there, done that! We don’t fret when she throws a fit (shes 14 months and already throws them!), we just keep on walking knowing she’ll get over it real quick! With our first child, it was a totally different story!
Faster Learning Curve
Our youngest is learning new things all the time … and faster than the first one did. Two weeks ago she started hopping! HOPPING! My other two never jumped at 14 months. She sees her older siblings moving and playing all the time and she uses that to her advantage! She wants to be just like them and can’t wait to do the things they are doing. One morning, while driving the eldest to school, we were singing song after song (the wheels on the bus, number rock, abc’s) and it occurred to me how much my youngest is learning at such a young age listening to all of these songs we are teaching her. She has built in teachers with her everyday!
My favorite, (which you already listed) is built in buddies. They entertain themselves. With my first I got to hold all the time, with the second not so much. I thought with the third I would never even see him let alone hold him. I got to hold him a bunch (and not just wear him, I didn’t start wearing him till 8ish months) because the other two play together so well!
I never even considered only having one child, I knew I wanted multiple, now I just have to figure out how many!