I’m the oldest of three children, and I don’t really remember my mom ever telling me she was pregnant with my sister. I was 2 1/2 when she was born, and I just remember going to the hospital and my dad telling me on the car ride there we were going to see my new sister.
“Wake Up Little Susie” was playing on the radio, on a tape of Simon & Garfunkel’s Concert in Central Park. I remember this part because when I saw my newborn sleeping sister, I said, “Wake up little Susie!” and that is how she was named.
I had just turned six when my brother was born. My memory of gaining a new sibling was much different than my first experience, but perhaps it was because I was older.
I distinctly remember my mom and dad sitting me and my sister down to tell us that there was a baby growing in my mom’s belly and that we could feel the kicks. I remember reading stories to her belly and singing songs. When I found out I was expecting my second child, this was the experience I wanted for my daughter.
How I Involved My Daughter as a “Big Sis” During My Second Pregnancy
The day I took the pregnancy test which had two pink lines, indicating my son Asher was on the way, I told my daughter Lucie I had a baby growing. She didn’t really seem to understand. She was only 18 months old at the time. As my pregnancy progressed and I grew larger, I helped her become more and more comfortable with the idea of a new baby in the family by:
- Letting her feel the baby kick and explaining it was her new baby brother growing in mama’s tummy
- Asking her what she would like to name their sibling (you may fall in love with the suggestion!)
- Showing her the sonogram pictures
- Reading stories that center around mom and dad bringing home a new sibling, and what that can mean as a big sister or brother — I recommend Arthur’s New Baby Book by Marc Brown
- Including her in the gender reveal by giving her cupcakes with blue or pink candies on top
- Allowing her to help reveal the pregnancy with a special big brother/big sister photo shoot. It doesn’t need to be fancy. You can take the photo yourself!
- Asking her to help choose a coming home outfit for her new baby brother or sister
Once Baby Arrived
When my son was born, I was so excited for Lucie to meet him, and even though he was in the NICU, we tried our best to show her that she had a baby brother. The nurses lifted the blinds, and my husband picked Lucie up to see the baby while I held him up in the back of the nursery. She was so excited, she chattered the entire car ride home about the baby.
Fast forward a year later, and Lucie and Asher are the best of friends (most of the time except — when sibling rivalry and jealous feelings over who is grabbing Mom’s attention that moment can get in the way of even the best sibling friendships). Lucie loves her baby brother, she loves being a big sister, and I’m happy the transition from one to two has been easy for her.
They love to play and cuddle together, and I’m so glad they have one another — now and once they become adults. I hope the deep connection they feel now always lasts.
