How to Help Someone Through a Loss Anniversary Date

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Losing a loved one is never easy. Losing a sibling, especially at a young age, is even harder.

My sister, Brittany, passed away January 30, 2006 at the age of 15 from Epilepsy. I had just turned 17 two weeks before her passing so we were close in age.

But we were more than sisters, we were best friends.

It’s hard to believe it’s been almost a decade, the 10 year anniversary of when she left this life. Anniversaries are usually something to be celebrated – a milestone of sorts – but not in this case. When our loved one’s “death reminder date” rolls around it’s so hard on those left behind. I still feel as anxious and upset as I have every year on this same date. No matter how much time passes, it doesn’t get any easier.

And while January 30, the actual date, is especially hard to face, it’s not just that one day that is difficult. It’s the entire month. I start feeling anxious around January 1 and it gets progressively worse as the date approaches. I found an amazing way to celebrate her birthday every year by organizing the Brittany Allison Corgan Memorial 5K, but I have yet to find something to keep me insanely busy during the month of January.

But it’s more than just that one month. November and December are extremely difficult too – right around the holidays. I’m one of those annoying people who put up their Christmas tree during the first week of November … not because I’m jolly and festive, but because I try to “get in the holiday spirit” for my kids and that takes time when there is big hole in my heart. It’s my attempt to psyche myself up in a way.

For those who have not experienced the loss of someone close, it can be difficult to know how to help and be supportive.

How to Help Someone Through a Loss Anniversary Date - Columbia SC Moms Blog

Simple Ways to Show Your Support

Every year since my sisters death a nice young lady that was in her class in school sends my parents flowers on my sister’s birthday. Every year. That kindness overwhelms my heart. Here are some easy things you can do to show your love and support.

  • Give them a hug
  • Make them dinner
  • Take them out for lunch
  • Send them a nice handwritten card to let them know you are thinking of them
  • Send flowers in remembrance
  • Call them on the phone
  • Offer to go with them to visit their friend/ family member’s grave
  • Listen to them
  • Pray for them
  • Buy them ice cream (it always makes me feel better)
  • Be there – your presence is the best present

It doesn’t have to be huge gesture to have an impact. Just knowing that you care and helping someone’s memory live on means the most.

These are just a few ways to help those who you love that are suffering. What would you add to the list?

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