How NOT to Potty Train your Toddler!

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My little girl turned two in March. We spend over $100 a month on diapers and wipes. I am ready for her to learn how to use the potty and to wear actual underpants that I can wash (yes, I know about cloth diapers … but, no). In fact, I was ready for her to learn how to use the potty in December (Hello?! She was not even two in December). Needless to say, that didn’t work out so we tried again in April. No dice. Third times a charm, right? We tried in June and I just knew she was going to catch on. Nope.

So, now I have decided to let it go and let the Potty Training Gods whisper in my ear when it is truly time to work on this. Here are some things I’ve learned and how I know now is not the time –

Two year olds don’t care about your schedule.

I am a very scheduled/structured person. You ask me what I am doing on a Tuesday one month from now and chances are I am going to have a pretty good idea of how that day is going to go. That’s why I figured if I put “potty training” on my calendar … it would just happen and I could check it off and go about my life. THAT IS NOT WHAT HAPPENED. I now realize, I just have to wait until my girl writes it on HER calendar.

Two year olds don’t stay in one place.

All three times I attempted potty training, I cleared out the kitchen of anything with fabric and brought in all the toys and the potty chair (because everyone wants to eat in a bathroom/kitchen combo, right?). Then I closed the baby gates and waited for the fun to start. All that resulted in was a naked prisoner in my kitchen trying to get to all the areas of the house with fabric. It was only when she was sitting on the carpet or on the couch did she decide to pee. Sigh.

Two years old don’t care how many times you read Oh Crap! Potty Training (or any other potty training manual for parents).

I really love this book, for some reason … even though it hasn’t seemed to work out for me yet. It makes sense and I still plan to follow her method of potty training. The trick is, I now know – wait until your toddler is truly capable of using the potty on her own (and YES there is a whole chapter dedicated to figuring this out). Can my girl dress herself yet? NO. Is she telling me when she has pooped or peed in her diaper? NO. Is she taking the chair of the potty and putting it on her head? YES.

Two year olds just like to be around mommy and daddy.

I thought my girl was ready to use the potty because she seems to always ends up in the bathroom with my husband or myself. She says things like, “mommy is using the potty.” So, I assumed SHE wanted to use the potty too. Nope. She just likes to make all things a family affair. That’s cool. The dogs come in too. We are a tight family. Also, we need a bigger bathroom.

Two year olds aren’t necessarily into those board books and videos about the potty because they like the potty or want to know how to use it.

To get my girl excited about using the potty, I checked out all the potty board books from both Richland Library and Lexington County Public Library. I checked out DVDs and looked up videos on YouTube (careful with that). She loved reading the books about the potty and giggling at the naked bottoms. She asked to watch (over and over) bears and other characters use the potty. But, that did not mean she wanted to try it out too. In fact, while she was watching the videos, she peed on the floor. Potty right next her. Then she told me to clean it up and bring her more snacks. Oh well. 

When did you potty train your toddler? What tips and tricks worked for you?

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Valerie Byrd-Fort
Valerie Byrd Fort was born in Florida, but when she was four years old, her family moved to the midlands and never looked back. She is mom to Katy (human) and to Lucky, Mozzy, and Penny (rescue dogs). She is married to Marty Fort, owner of the Lexington School of Music, Columbia Arts Academy, and Irmo Music Academy. She is an Instructor for the School of Library & Information Science at the University of South Carolina, where she teaches Children’s Literature to future classroom teachers and librarians. She is also Coordinator for Cocky's Reading Express, the University of South Carolina's literacy outreach program. Valerie is passionate about books, literacy, libraries, and reading aloud with children of ALL ages. She writes about books and other literacy related topics on her blog, Library Goddess. In her free time, Valerie enjoys reading, Barre3, going to Target and endless scrolling of social media  

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