Passionate About Columbia SC
and the Moms Who Live Here

Pregnancy vs. Pregnancy With a Toddler

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This is my second (and very likely my last) time being pregnant. I’ve got my boy and I’m getting my girl, so I probably won’t fight my husband on his insistence that this is IT.

Things are pretty different this go around. Obviously … my whole life is different than it was last time!

When I got pregnant with my son, I was living in a garage apartment outside my parents house. My now husband and I had only been dating a few months and clearly were living recklessly, since we got pregnant!

I’ve always dreamed of the day I would get pregnant and have babies, so while it was a little scary at first, I embraced the role of ‘mommy’ and started studying up on all things baby and motherhood.

We quickly took action and bought a house, got married, adopted a puppy, and settled in to life as a new family. I was working full time and eventually moved offices and shifted to a ‘reduced full time’ position at the credit union where I was employed.

When I was pregnant that first time, I may have been working but I had so much extra time. Every morning when my alarm went off, I pulled out my phone and ‘checked on the baby’. I had two or three pregnancy apps and I read through each one every day. I posted countless questions and thoughts in my Facebook “pregnancy group” of women all due around the same time. People at work pampered me and were so nice! People would come back from their breaks with treats for me like sweet tea or cookies. Feed the hungry pregnant monster! I loved every second of it!

I worked from 11-5 so I was able to sleep in a little bit if I wanted, and could take the mornings slow. I napped if I wanted to on weekends and was able to lay in bed as much as my heart desired. We had a kitchen table back then but we rarely used it. Our home was our bed. My husband and I ate almost every meal in that bed, watching our beloved Netflix. Ahh, the good life.

I remember looking at all of my puppy’s toys scattered all over the living room and thinking “oh my gosh how do toddler moms deal with pregnancy??” Well, I guess I should have known that one day I would find out first hand!

This pregnancy has been different in so many ways. I don’t ‘work’ a day job anymore … I work a 24/7 day and night job. I don’t have to deal with customers who are usually nice but sometimes angry and rude, but I do have to cope with a toddler whose mood, attitude and behavior often fluctuates without notice.

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Don’t get me wrong, my son is a DREAM. He has his moments of tantrum throwing, disobeying or copping an attitude, but let’s be real … so do I! He’s been great at potty training, switching to a big bed, and sleeping (for the most part). He’s polite, kind, and so cuddly. He speaks really well, plays independently pretty often and eats most things without complaint (most of the time). I feel like the universe is going to give me a sassy, ornery and rambunctious little girl as payback … but I don’t want to jinx myself. Maybe I can get lucky twice!

Right now I’m working on teaching him to clean up his toys before he moves to another activity. It’s going pretty well and I’m glad, because I’m getting to the point in my pregnancy where I really don’t feel like bending over a lot or crawling around on the floor.

This pregnancy, my husband works and I stay home, but of course am still expected to carry the same workload as before I was pregnant. There was a time during my first trimester when I just couldn’t make myself cook dinner like I had before. We were living off of Mexican food, tater tots and chicken nuggets, and cereal. This go around, I rarely have an appetite. That’s good for weight gain but not great for my family. Despite not feeling like eating and getting queasy at the thought, I still have to feed my family, and I try to give them healthy food as much as possible. Not to mention I often forget to cook a meal simply because I don’t get hungry like I used to. 

Being pregnant and having a toddler is NOT easy. I’m so tired 85% of the time. All that rest I got to take advantage of with Leopold in my belly is nonexistent this time! This time, I am a nanny too.  So I am carting two toddlers around, trying to keep busy but not too busy, and attempting to maintain my sanity. Luckily my nanny gig is only three days a week and they play so well together that it’s almost easier when I watch her! My husband keeps telling me I need to “hurry up and birth that baby” so that Leopold will have someone to play with. I have to remind him that it won’t happen right away!

When I was pregnant with Leopold, I practiced Hypnobabies. When practicing for a Hypnosis style birth, you are supposed to listen to certain tracks at night for 30 minutes or an hour at a time. This prepares your mind for what you are going to experience and fills you with positive thoughts regarding the birthing time. I really want to try Hypnobabies again but am already questioning how that is going to work! My evenings are often broken up by Leopold needing to wake up to pee, dogs wanting attention, and my desire to relax and watch Netflix with a bowl of ice cream. I’m sure I’ll make it happen, but it won’t be as easy this time!

During this pregnancy so far, I think I only check on my apps once a week, when I “level up” and baby has gone through a week of changes. I’m impressed by my ability to still take weekly photos though, even if they are a day (or three) late!

It isn’t all bad though. A lot of moms in my mommy group have boys Leopold’s age, and baby girls that are 6 months and under. I’m happy Leopold is able to see some of his friends welcome baby sisters (and even brothers) and I kind of hope it will seem ‘normal’ to him once she arrives. He will be three and I think that’s a pretty good age difference! He is such a loving child, I am really so excited to see him love on his baby sister!

This pregnancy has gone by much slower and much faster all at the same time. I feel like the first 15 weeks were the slowest because I hadn’t told ‘the world’ about it yet. Keeping a secret is SO HARD for me so I was in agony! Now, I sometimes forget I’m pregnant (except for the lack of appetite, frequent peeing, headaches, acid reflux/heartburn and general discomfort). I have an anterior placenta this time where I did not last time, so I don’t feel this baby move as much. That by itself makes it easier to forget sometimes!

Being pregnant and having a toddler is a whole different ball game. It has it’s ups and downs and that irrational fear of “how could I love another kid as much as I love this one?” but it’s crazy exciting and special too. If you are in my shoes, I’m sure you know what I’m talking about!

If you have a toddler and are thinking of getting pregnant, I hope you go for it! Let that love grow, mama!

Have you been pregnant while having a toddler? How has the experience been different for you?

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