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God Never Gives You More Than You Can Handle

God Never Gives You More Than You Can Handle - Columbia SC Moms BlogIt was about ten years ago. My husband and I nervously awaited the results of our first 20 week ultrasound. Like most expectant moms, I was excited to find out if we were having a boy or a girl, but I also prayed for a healthy report from the doctor.

As the black and white images fluttered across the screen, my doctor was quiet for too long. Fear began to grip at my heart while I whispered prayers for the health of my baby. Why didn’t he say something?

God never gives you more than you can handle.

All the possible scenarios my paranoid mind had imagined and hints of others I didn’t even know existed were pounding in my head. What could be wrong?

Finally the doctor spoke words I never even imagined I would hear.

“You are carrying twins.”

The next few months were a flurry of preparation and education, trying to catch up on parenting at twice the rate I anticipated. There were more costs, more concerns, more details, more doctors, more complications. There were moments of lying awake like a child on Christmas Eve. My heart would race with the excitement and anticipation of receiving the most precious gift of my life; a special blessing that most other moms couldn’t help me to understand. I tried to plan, tried to read, tried to research, but overwhelmingly felt immensely underprepared.

God never gives you more than you can handle.

Soon we learned it was two girls, two identical curly headed darlings that kept my uterus in a state of constant stress until their arrival six weeks early.

I could try to describe those first few months, but I have to admit my memories are jumbled and dim: nursing, pumping, bottles, formula, reflux, diapers, baths, naps, appointments, kisses and tears. Baby tears of sharing mommy’s arms, and my tears of not having enough to give. Feeling at times like my husband and I were being slowly pulled apart by two little lives that we desperately loved more than ourselves. Wondering if God were trying to teach me humility as all my theories of parenting slowly drifted out the window, replaced by the reality of utter exhaustion.

God never gives you more than you can handle.

twins

But God is good, and His love energizes parents beyond their capabilities. Those little babies became precious toddlers who made us laugh and warmed our hearts, but still never gave us a moment’s rest. Shy and sweet, with a special twin-bond, they grew and learned. They became the two most amazing big sisters in the history of the world when our son was born. They never cease to amaze me with their gifts and talents.

I’m facing the reality that my girls are nearly a decade old and they will probably leave my home in less time than that. Until then, I face navigating this tricky world with identical tweenagers who love each other desperately but are also desperately competitive and sensitive.

God never gives you more than you can handle.

You hear it all the time, and people quoted it to me over and over those first couple of years. It sounds good. And after all, there are pieces of truth in the phrase. God empowers His children to obey Him, and to face obstacles that overwhelm us.

Still, I disagree emphatically with the phrase, and would like to point out it is not found in the Bible. My advice is not “you can do it” but that you can’t do it alone. You will feel drained, you will feel defeated, you will feel utterly overwhelmed.

But being a parent is a gift from God that daily teaches me how much I need Him. And how I will never have enough to give on my own.

Life gives me so much more than I can handle, and I can only face it with the strength of God.

Realizing I need God every day is the greatest gift that having twins has given me. I will never be enough, but God’s grace covers me and all of my weaknesses.

Are you a mother of multiples? How do you handle the phrase, “God never gives you more than you can handle?”

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One Response to God Never Gives You More Than You Can Handle

  1. Hilda
    Hilda August 17, 2016 at 6:13 am #

    This!!! I could not agree with you more! It always bothers me when people say God doesn’t give you more than you can handle. Of course life brings many many many things that I cannot absolutely cannot handle alone.

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